What’s your relationship like with the scale?
I’ve been jumping on the scale every single chance I get. I’m so worried that I’m gaining weight. I’m not worried about losing right now.
I sobbed about it in my eating group, and made a very definite decision not to weigh myself until November 1st.
Well, of course, the very next day I WEIGHED MYSELF AGAIN!
The scale is the first thing you see when you go into the women’s locker room. I can’t avoid the locker room because I often change/shower there.
I managed to walk right on by the scale for about a week. Well, this time, I wasn’t able to resist the urge to weigh.
And, I’m up two pounds.
It’s not a catastrophe, but it feels like it.
In the scheme of all things, it is not a big deal. But, I’m heartbroken.
These are my feeling parts being activated:
MAD, SAD, SCARED, TICKLED (about how upset I am! I find myself slightly giggling), UPSET
If I infused mySELF with my inner wise woman she might say,
“It’s okay. You are still amazing. You are still loved. You are on a journey. It’s going to be all right.”
Somehow, by checking my weight so frequently, I thought it would somehow undo the so-called damage (really a lesson!!) that all my overeating has taken on my body.
I know that doesn’t make sense, but that’s what was going on in my head.
The truth is, weighing myself every 3-4 weeks feels like a better match for me. I have a medical condition that I use as an excuse as to why I need to monitor my weight. I’m not ready to ditch weighing, but I really need a break. But will I actually take one?
My weight is not an indicator of the progress I’ve made in pursuing health and intuitive eating/living.
I think it all comes down to not really trusting my body to find its healthy weight on its own.
On another note….
I took my two favorite exercise classes tonight, right after my 2 pound gain showed on the scale.
I almost didn’t complete both classes, because I was so upset. But, as I began exercising, I kept looking in the mirror and noticing how freaking awesome I looked doing tricep push-ups, and tricep dips. (ok, there were other moves that were not as flattering, hahaha.)
So what does it all mean?
It means, continue to show myself compassion. Continue to sit with alleged food cravings, because I am a new person, and I can battle through them. It just takes a few horrible moments to get back to feeling good about the way I use food again. Continue to trust this amazing body I’ve been gifted with while on Earth. Continue to respect and take care of it in a manner that is joyful.
So, tell me about your scale woes/scale parties…. How do you achieve balance?