Being Fully Alive

There is Joy in Community

There are Tears in Community

There is hustle and bustle

There is quiet

There is wondering

There is assurance

Why do I reject it?

Why do I crave it so?

I reject it because it means that I might not be accepted.

I reject it because relational risk seems like suicide.

I crave it because I was created to be with people.

So I might Grow.

So I might give

And Take

Showing people your soul

Laying out your unmet needs

Is

Paper-thin hopes

Crackling

When you don’t fully know yourself

It’s hard to show others who you are.

But

Maybe that’s part of being in community

Getting to Know ME

In the supported circle of others

Maybe they are getting to know themselves as well

I won’t know

Until I ask

Until I show up

Until I breathe in the undiscovered love around me

Relational Risk ~ Suicide?

Really?

Suicide is gone forever, no more feelings, no more hopes, no more dreams

In Suicide you lose yourself

With relational risk

I lose

That Girl That Hides

She must go

I don’t have any more hopes and dreams for the hide-r

The blooming bud is where I am now.

Purple_Milkweed_Asclepias_purpurascens_BudsSoaking

In the Love

Getting rooted In

a Family

The Word

Traditions

A New Focus of Eternal Values, as opposed to earthly materialism.

Some Day I will form My own seeds and disperse

Is it possible I might be doing that now?

This cycle continues

The give The take

The supporting the encouraging

I’m taking in love, I’m giving My Story, My Hopes

The Girl That Hides

Must Be Acknowledged

Must Be Heard

And reminded

That God has plans for for Her

A message to share

About Not Using Food

And Being Fully Alive

Must the Girl in The Bottle Leave Forever?

Is it truly suicide?

Or might I come back to her from time to time

When I need to

She may have a new role

New Employment

She may be the one to re-energize me

To honor the sacredness of the quiet

She may leave, but not be forgotten entirely

She will nudge me

Letting me know when it’s time to go inside

A Peaceful Place, no longer a Cocoon

The glass bottle will be broken

She will wait for me

Offer some tea

And let me slumber

Away from the Noise

Of that Much Needed Community

About eatingasapathtoyoga

Learning to savor food, yoga, & life.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Being Fully Alive

  1. Kim says:

    Wow. Yes. Yes. Yes, I crave the community. It is my inner most true self that is actually good with the community. But it is often a very uncomfortable ride, because of the weight. Not feeling good enough for the community….getting exhausted from having to “proove” more, be just a little bit better at this or that, so they don’t see the fat, first and foremost. Having to be funnier, or more selfless today than you were yesterday, so the community will keep liking you, because if you slip up….then there is always the excuse in your head….it was because of the weight. It’s a hard wagon to pull.

  2. Leslie Neshama says:

    Your Song of Self is simply beautiful. I suspect you are unaware of how beautiful you are.
    I accept you unconditionally. As you grow, and as the seasons change, may you realize that beauty is in you, in all of us……..

  3. Your words are beautiful! Thank you for sharing and putting yourself in the community.

Comments are closed.