I am continuing to journal my stay at Green Mountain at Fox Run, in Vermont.
8:45 Vermonting to Scout Camp Road
10:00 Upper Body Strength Training
11:15 Extended Okemo Loop Walk
1:00 Tai Chi on the lawn over looking the Green mountains! It was magnificent! I had taken tai chi at my gym years ago, but didn’t really get into it, & found it confusing. This time the instructor explained all of the moves/positions ahead of time & then we started into the tai chi flow. It was good!
2:15 I did some cardio/weights in the weight room.
3:45 Binge Eating Series: Binge Beliefs: Do They Fuel The Fire?
The instructor, Darla, asked us, “What do you know about your binge eating?” (I will post my response at a later date.) & “What am I asking the food to do for me?”
Did you know that there are 30% MORE binge-eaters than anorexics & bulimics combined?
Many people would not qualify for Binge-Eating Disorder but have a binge-style of eating.
Darla encouraged us to get to know our eating. What are our thoughts? Feelings? Beliefs?
We had to share the first time that we binged. Of course, that lead to crying on my part.
If you label yourself a binge-eater, you make it your job & your identity. Just as if you label yourself an insomniac, does that really help you get any more sleep? Ooooh, that one hit home for me!
HOW I TALK ABOUT MYSELF, AFFECTS HOW I AM GOING TO FEEL.
We really have to explore our patterns around eating. What are your triggers? Mine are: being too tired, too hungry, too lonely, too uncertain, too anxious. Know your triggers and create space into your body via breath.
After your make space within your body, you need to start guessing the feelings that are underneath, you know the ones you want to avoid most? I’ve been discovering that my exiled parts/feelings are ones that feel flawed and unworthy. We have to sometimes take time to sit with these exiled feelings by writing in a journal, if it is stream of consciousness. Binge-ing can be a result of not listening nor paying attention to these exiles. It is a red flag that there is a story within you that is not being heard.
We can be radical with our binge-ing behavior: Acknowledge the binge-ing part… is it protecting you? From what? Get curious. Befriend the binge thoughts, when you are ready.
If you decide to go ahead and binge, make it mindful. Stay in your body. Really taste the food. How does it feel in your body? How do you want to feel in your body after the binge? Try not to use judgment, just collect data & be an observer of your binge. *Note: Sensory specific satiety says that typically within 5 bites of eating a food, you are usually bored of it…. so important to eat a variety of foods!
After your binge, possibly prepare a speech for afterward. “The binge just happened. I am not going to beat myself up about this. I am doing the best that I can to take care of myself.” (Geneen Roth has a great audio cd to play after a binge.)
This was fascinating to me: 70% of binge-eaters can recover WITHOUT support if they plan their 3 meals & 2 snacks at predictable times. Feeding yourself goes a long way. I have to admit that during my time at Green Mountain, the predictability of meals was very comforting to me.
After the pre-prepared speech, take some time for reflection & self-monitoring. What happened? Be a detective. Again, be an non-judgmental observer. Show self-compassion.
Know that has you increase pleasure, feeling good, freedom, creativity in your life, binge-eating will lessen.
For binge-eaters, there is some jazz & excitement in the planning & secrecy of the binge. So, you have to increase pleasure & healthy rebel energy to take its place.
6:00 Dinner Served
7:00 Cooking Demonstration on Dazzling Dressings *I skipped out to watch “Toddlers & Tiaras” (MAJOR TRAIN WRECK) & part of “So You Think You Can Dance” (loved the danced, didn’t care for the obnoxious judges.)
What beliefs do you have that hold you back?
What moves you into a state of well-being?