So, this is where I’m at:
I’m no longer eating emotionally.
I’m not really binge eating.
As a result, my body is changing a lot.
My internal system of processing feelings is a mess. I feel like an open wound. RAW.
I mostly only eat when I’m physically hungry.
But, at meal times, I am overeating.
It’s like my firefighter parts, the ones that protect me from feeling exiled parts of me, are super steamed.
“What do you mean you want to stop overeating? We gave up binge eating. We gave up eating emotionally. Now you expect us to give up the one last coping mechanism we have? Especially, now when we are so vulnerable?”
The firefighters act like mySelf is ridiculous.
But, Self says otherwise.
Self is all of the C’s:
Which parts of Self get left behind when you are stuck in an old story?
What are YOUR firefighters?
My firefighters seem to be a pain, as they can be unhealthy coping mechanisms. But really, they just want to help. They want to distract us from uncomfortable feelings that arise. It’s time for me to give my firefighters a different job, because while they have a clear objective, I’m now willing to sit with scary thoughts, at least for a time.