Sometimes feeling your emotions sucks really bad.

Sometimes feeling your emotions sucks really bad.

I got some really bad news today. Well, at least it is really bad in my head. I’m really awesome at catastrophizing situations, so we will see.

At first, I wanted to handle the situation right away. So, I called a few higher ups and acted really tough, but nothing was resolved. Left some more voice mails. Almost started crying on one of them, but held it together.

Almost made a crazy decision to add upheaval to my day by trying to bring some resolution, but I sat back and though, “What a great opportunity to sit with my feelings!”

Well, that was my Inner Compassionate Curious Self saying that.

My manager part was saying, “We really need to work hard to handle this and get it done.”

My worried part said, “You can’t handle this. This is too much.”

My firefighter part said, “Let’s eat. Even better yet, let’s binge! Quick let’s numb it out. C’mon!!!”

I feel the stress in my shoulders and in my stomach. Although, I’m also physically hungry. I’ve waited too long to eat breakfast. (A rarity for me.)

I’m thinking deep breathing, eating breakfast, being with people (and not cocooning), & a good night’s sleep might be in order. OOOH, exercise, too!

Binge eating would feel so good in the moment. But, I don’t want those behaviors in my life any more. Even if it sucks to feel, I don’t want to wake up from a nightmare with time gone by and wrappers everywhere.

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About eatingasapathtoyoga

Learning to savor food, yoga, & life.
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8 Responses to Sometimes feeling your emotions sucks really bad.

  1. Leslie Neshama says:

    The poignancy and power of this post is amazing. I read this when I was poised to jump into Bingeing. Now, just a minute or two later, having read your words, and having passed that incredibly dangerous minute of decision to binge, I am crying now…….I guess we made a moment of contact, you and I, when understanding how much pull a binge feeling has, and then — letting it pass…..It blows my mind……Thank you thank you thank you. I need help right now with my chaotic eating behaviors. But I am deep breathing, and there are no ‘wrappers’ all around for me to clean up. So incredibly grateful……:) ❤

  2. monica says:

    Love this. Thank you for sharing

  3. Debbish says:

    Amazing self-awareness and well done on getting through it all.

    I hope it (the issue at hand) works out okay for you!

  4. Caroline says:

    Thanks so much. I was just noticing myself saying this to myself yesterday. I am astounded by how I feel, physically and emotionally, when I eat food that my body does not want. Even when it is good food! I actually said, out loud, yesterday, I want to eat that food, but I will feel like crap later, so I won’t. I think that is the first time I have ever said this in my whole life. Your post is timely for me and I am grateful.

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